There are many nuanced aspects of tattooing that make this craft a difficult one to crack. Perhaps none more so than for a tattoo to exist it requires another being as invested in your vision. This person then needs to possess the will, commitment, trust and myriad other qualities to actually see their skin transformed for the rest of this life. So it’s always strange for me when I hear of tattooers who have little to no regard for their clients or their desires from a tattoo.

I have two daughters one of which is just over a year old and can say a few simple words, the other is 7 years old and she can talk the hind legs off a donkey. What I realised some time ago is that collectively we spend so much time teaching and encouraging children how to talk but very little time teaching them how to listen effectively. Not with the aim of listening to answer back or provide a solution but rather listening to understand and empathise with the person talking. I know in years gone by I have been all too guilty of the former myself, keen to impose my knowledge. It is not a pleasant characteristic and ironically it is often those who speak most that we struggle to listen to. There’s an arrogance to the person who believes they have an answer for everything and often they are more concerned with being “right” than finding a truth. When I stumbled across a quote by The Dalai Lama that read “When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new.” it helped bring about a new perspective and whilst I still get caught up at times with ego and emotion I have made vast improvements in my ability to not just hear someone talk but really listen to them speak.

Tattooing has been pivotal in my desire to increase my capacity to listen and better understand the people I share my days with. Of course, there is spending countless hours with the same person where I want to be able to enjoy this time and also provide a good experience for them. But there is also how I approach each tattoo where I collaborate with the client to create a design that is true to them. I view it as though I’m translating their story into their skin, it will be written by my hand and in my writing style but it must tell their story. I have covered countless well executed tattoos for various reasons. Sometimes the person wants to evolve, they still like the tattoo but it doesn’t represent them any more. Other times they are unhappy with the process and experience of receiving the tattoo and do not wish to be reminded of it. In my eyes no matter how “good” the tattoo is if the person wearing it wishes to erase even the memory of it then you have failed in your job as a tattooer.

A successful conversation requires those involved to understand when it is time to talk and when it is time to listen. The same is true for a tattoo. I screen those I choose to work with the best I can via email. If I’m extending the courtesy of listening to their words with an open mind then I expect at least the same back. I have spent many years refining the process used to create a tattoo, giving me an in-depth understanding of how, what and why I operate the way I do. I work in this way on a daily basis and as a result I want to work with people who respect my opinion. A key component in all of this is the respect we both give and receive from our fellow people.

As a tattoo artist, it is a complex relationship when your “canvas” has an opinion about what you create. A page does not care what is written, nor a piece of paper what is drawn upon it. Canvas has no preference as to what is painted on it and a camera does not care what it photographs. A human being of sound mind that is about to get tattooed though, they might have something to say. I think that’s worth a listen.